Try walking into a bar and getting really excited about turning 22, no one cares much. But on this, the glorious day of my birth 22 years ago, I will tell you all 22 inconsequential and rather useless things about me.
1. My favorite program growing up was “Gospel Bill”
2. I would have been studying Paleontology right now were it not for growing up being force fed creationist propoganda. Alas, my subconcious knew that I could never actually touch Dino bones if I believed the tripe, so it steered me towards a much better field for a young earther- Archaeology (actually, it’s almost worse than paleontology).
3. I’m an evil evilutionist, humanist, feminist, liberal. Myself from four years ago would have hated me (and I would have loved making her uncomfortable)
4. A former middle school teacher once said “You’ll do anything to get a reaction out of people” in a hopeless tone of voice. He was right.
5. I had no idea wtf the CRC was before I got to Calvin and I thought that “predestination” was the prequel to the movie “Final Destination”
6. An ex boyfriend once wanted to see what my former rugby coach/ his English teacher would do if he told him that I beat him. My coach’s reaction was, “Don’t sign up for anything you can’t handle.”
7. I met my boyfriend’s little brother before I really met him. I was a sophomore in first year religion and told the group that I was questioning my faith and described myself as an agnostic. He jumped straight up in the air and every day from then on I tried really hard (when I actually came to class) to sit next to him b/c I found his reaction fascinating. Unfortunately, he always had friends around him.
8. My guilty pleasure is Demon Hunter. I have a crush on the lead singer’s voice (but not on him, he is not very attractive).
9. I got a plant for my birthday that I have named Simon Magnis (points if you know who he is!). I once had a plant named Iscariot who I was found of the singing the Showdown song to.
10. I want a pair of custom chucks. Badly.
11. I used to be an awesome speaker, and then I started playing rugby and getting concussions.
12. I was named after a character on the 80’s tv show “Airwolf”
13. I was supposed to be a boy. Coincidentally, there is a dude who attends Calvin who has the exact name I would have had if I had been a boy (first and last name). I think I would have been way hotter than him though.
14. After Latin and Greek I find it damn near impossible to pronounce the English “V” correctly. This
makes it hard to say Dutch last names. Which makes it somewhat hard to function at Calvin.
15. I once found POD to be “hardcore”
16. Mrs. Degree-ers think I’m one of them. They get a rude awakening when I cuss them out when they try talking to me about how great it’ll be to never have to work (they are the engineer-seekers).
17. I am fond of stalking those with giant backpacks, fuzzy hats or fantastic homeschool t-shirts w/ the RA.
18. I hate rules, even though I usually follow them all of my own accord in my everyday behavior.
19. Calling something “mandatory” is a good way to get me to not show up.
20. I have gotten into fights with other Classics majors about whether Latin qualifies as “music” or “poetry” (It’s poetry, Dammit! Greek is music).
21. I didn’t go out for my 21st birthday.
22. No one even dares to argue or discuss the Bible with me ever since I destroyed a floormates cheesy theology using the original Greek. I’m kind of a bastard that way.